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Beloved husband after 25 years of marriage began to "walk left"

 My husband and I have been living together for 25 years, and during this time we had 2 children: 18 and 23 years old. We never had misunderstandings in the family, friendship and love reigned, there were very few quarrels: for the entire time of our life together, we only quarreled a couple of times.

I always supported my husband, even when unpleasant moments happened, but I never reproached him, we experienced all the joys and difficulties together.

Friends considered us a family to follow, and my husband was a decent person who has stable family principles. It’s not even worth saying that in all the years they lived together, he never went to the left.

I got excited for the first time about two years ago, when I noticed small changes in him, but this was only in order to discuss everything at once, to find out.

Just in case, I also talked to him. He then just laughed at me. It so happened that we are almost always together: after work I go to his work, we spend part of the time there, then we go home.

If I am not at work, then I also try to be with him more and more. And after new suspicions, I decided, nevertheless, to keep him as much as possible in the field of view.

How I caught my husband red-handed

Until that moment, everything was fine, but for the last six months I felt that he was gradually changing: he cooled off towards me, from time to time he was thoughtful.

All my suspicions at that time were still at the mental level, since there were no other signs, for example, nightly SMS and calls. The only thing that bothered me was that once a month he went on a business trip.

After all, you can always check whether the spouse travels alone, but, to be honest, I myself was very scared to find out the truth until those same “kind people” were found who told me everything.

Just a week ago, I found out that he actually drives with some young girl together, besides this, they often meet, since his car was seen more than once on the same street - she lives there or works there, I don’t I know. What happened to me at that moment is beyond words.

I am 42 years old and so is my husband. He has his own business, a bowling alley, so he spends most of his time there. This means that during the day he has the right to be anywhere while I work. I also have a small beauty salon. In a word, both are busy.

Until the last, I hoped that this was not true, or at least that all this was not serious. For me, my husband has always been a reliable support, and I just can’t imagine now that this could somehow happen.

Maybe I'm just too used to it that I can't imagine life without it now.  Children will soon find a mate, but I thought, on the contrary, that the time has come - to live for yourself. After all, our marriage began with children.

Confession

I didn’t say anything to him right away, but then I decided to tell him everything. I myself have not been a girl for a long time, but this is the first time I have been in such a situation!

I was shaking all over with anger and resentment. This woman has destroyed the well-being and peace in my family. I decided for myself that if all this turns out to be true, then I will definitely find out who this woman is and what she is like.

Since everyone thinks that our home is idyllic, I have to keep everything to myself, and there was no one to consult with someone or pour out my soul to someone.

As a result, I was mentally ready for a conversation, I decided to find out everything that I was doing wrong, and whether there was any way to fix it all.

She told him everything she knew, heard, and he did not even deny it. I asked him how long they met, he said that eight months. He answered honestly, apparently, and even noted that she herself was a good person ...

I don’t even remember what happened to me after these words, everything seemed somehow unreal to me. Restraint and wisdom vanished as if by hand, almost smashed the whole house, I had such a hysteria for the first time in my life.

It was evident how frightened he was, reassured me, said that we were together forever and nothing threatened us. She asked me to give her phone number - she didn’t, she didn’t want to call in front of me either. He only wrote a message that everything was over between them, to which she replied: "Good."

Do you think they are serious or just put on a show to splurge? (write your answer in the comments).

Why did he do this

At that moment, I didn't think anything. I had such strong anger that I wanted to tear it apart. But still I decided to gather my last strength and find out everything to the end. I don’t know what else he wanted from me, given that I always tried for him.

She always supported him, did not interfere with business, happily discussed work, never dripped on the brains over trifles. At home, love and affection, good relations with children were always waiting for him. Maybe he did well? Everywhere they love him, they are waiting.

Maybe he's tired of all this? What should a woman be like for her husband to start walking to the left? It is clear that after twenty-five years of marriage, passions can fade away, although we have never had problems with intimacy.

Is it really possible for a man to betray his family for the sake of a young body?  I couldn't help but say a word to her, after which he began to claim that he initiated the relationship, but now it's all over. How can you live in peace after such confessions? All the time he lived on two fronts, and how he managed to do this, I still do not understand.

Still, I could not calm down and ordered a printout of his phone number. They dated for two years!  It was from the moment when I began to suspect him of something! I see almost every day phone calls, sms, and moreover, to a greater extent from his side. He also managed to lie about 8 months!

How to understand all this? This is not just a walk on the sidelines, this is a real betrayal, a long deception. Now you need to try to act confidently, without tantrums, in cold blood.

After a while, I found out her name and age (25 years). She lives exactly on the same street where his car was seen several times (near the boutique, which she owns). I saw photos - blonde, beautiful, I wanted to go to her myself, but I don’t know why.

He asked me to forget about her, that this girl would no longer be in our lives. But I can't get anything from him. You have to say goodbye to a quiet life.

Always, feeling his love and care, I believed to the last that he would not destroy the family. Moreover, he knows very well that the children will never forgive him for this.

She told him that if it was so good there, then let him go to her, to which he replied that he did not want to hear anything about it, he had a family, and would not go anywhere. In general, I cease to understand something.

It is clear that his family is clearly not enough. Maybe I really made a mistake that I tried to be with him all the time? Maybe it was the other way around that pushed him to cheat on me?

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